Why Nigerians spend money the way we do (and how to change your story)

Your money story is not madness, it’s memory

The other day, I saw people arguing online about how someone “wasted” money. One person said, “Imagine buying a ₦400k phone when your rent isn’t even paid!” Another replied, “It’s my money, not yours!”

I just smiled. Because the older I get, the more I realise nobody is really crazy with their own money.

We’re all simply reacting to different stories.

Money decisions are rarely made in spreadsheets or financial calculators. They’re made in memories where you grew up, what you feared, what you lacked, and what you had to do to feel safe.

If you grew up in scarcity, your biggest dream is often security. You don’t care about “risk appetite” or “long-term yield.” You just want to know that tomorrow, you’ll still have food, light, and peace of mind.

But if you grew up in abundance, you might see money differently. You might take bold risks, because deep down, you believe that if things go wrong, you’ll bounce back.

Neither mindset is wrong. They’re simply reflections of different worlds.

Why Nigerians spend money the way we do

Let’s be real: in Nigeria, money trauma is generational.

Many of us watched our parents lose everything when the naira crashed. Some saw their savings vanish overnight, their properties seized, or their businesses fail because of one policy announcement.

So now, when someone like that says, “I don’t trust investments,” it’s not ignorance, it’s experience.

Meanwhile, another person might have seen their family’s wealth grow through long-term stocks or land ownership. That person will swear by delayed gratification.

Different scars, different mindsets.

That’s why judgment is never a financial strategy.

Before you label someone “wasteful” or “stingy,” remember, they’re simply playing the money game with the cards life dealt them.

The lessons behind our fears

Think about it.

Some parents fear debt because they once watched loans destroy families.

Some adults today fear waiting because they grew up in a generation that worships “overnight success.”

And many of our children will probably fear failure because we’ve made “winning” look too perfect online.

Each generation is fighting its own financial ghost.

So before you mock someone for saving too much, spending too much, or refusing to invest, pause. Ask yourself, what story might be driving them?

Because every spending habit has a memory behind it

The danger of pride in financial conversations

The real danger isn’t our difference. It’s pride thinking your experience is the only truth.

That’s why people fight online about saving versus investing, or whether to tithe or not, or how to “use money wisely.”

One person grew up watching their mum hustle in the market just to feed the family.
Another grew up in comfort, learning business from their dad’s office.
How can both people see money the same way?

They can’t.

And that’s okay.

The goal is not to agree on every financial philosophy. The goal is to understand that your version of “sense” was shaped by your background.

If God had swapped your stories, you might act exactly like the person you’re judging.

Empathy is one of the highest forms of financial intelligence

Before you call someone careless for buying aso-ebi or renting an expensive apartment, remember: people spend for emotional reasons more than logical ones.

Sometimes, spending is how people regain dignity.
Sometimes, giving is how they heal.
Sometimes, caution is how they survive.

Everyone’s “why” was born from a different “when.”

Empathy is what helps us see that clearly.

It’s what separates those who fight about money from those who grow with money.

You can rewrite your money story

Here’s the good news: your past doesn’t have to dictate your financial future.

Yes, maybe you grew up in lack and fear. Maybe you saw money ruin families, friendships, and even faith. But you can choose differently.

You can decide that the next chapter of your money story will be about wisdom, not worry.

Start by asking yourself:

• Why do I react this way to money?
• What am I afraid of losing?
• What does “enough” really mean to me?

Self-awareness is the beginning of financial healing.

Because no matter how many books you read or investment courses you take, if you don’t heal your money story, you’ll keep repeating it, just with bigger numbers.

Be loyal to your future, not your past

At some point, you must decide that your past pain won’t keep directing your financial GPS.

Choose to be more loyal to your future than your fear.

Learn. Heal. Grow. Build new habits.

The same way trauma is learned, so is peace. The same way scarcity was inherited, so can abundance.

Your background may explain your habits, but it doesn’t have to define your destiny.

As you evolve, let your money evolve too. Let it follow purpose, not pain.

Because the truth is, no one is crazy with their money. We’re all just trying to make peace with our past, provide for our present, and prepare for our future.

So before you judge, understand.
Before you react, reflect.
And before you give up, remember: you can always rewrite your story.